Things to think about, share about, and explore.

What’s the difference between … ?


consideration
courtesy
compassion
caring
codependence
acceptance
accepting unacceptable behavior
boundaries
controlling others
suggestion
carrying the message
advice
gossipping
confiding
sharing news
letting go
being a doormat
step study
thinking about the steps
working the steps
accepting responsibility for my behavior
accepting responsibility for other people’s feelings
communicating clearly
making someone understand
taking responsibility
controlling outcomes
care giving
caretaking
open meeting
closed meeting
pity
love
parenting
helping
being a good relative, friend, neighbor
service
enabling
doing for others what they can do for themselves
control
submission
resignation
surrender
want
need
loving interchange
crosstalk
amends
apologies
Al-Anon
therapy
a spiritual program
a religious program
privacy
secrecy
detachment
cutting off
estrangement

Can you think of more differences to explore? Please feel free to share!

Oh those pesky, pesky policies in the service manual. Who are they to dictate how my Al-Anon meeting is run?!?!

“They” are “we”.

For our group purpose there is but one authority – a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants – they do not govern. — Tradition Two

The ultimate responsibility and authority for Al-Anon world services belongs to the Al-Anon groups. — Concept One

I am the GR, the Group Representative, for my home group. I get the group conscience of my group and take it to Area assemblies. My Area Delegate takes the group conscience from all us GRs to the World Service Conference.

Usually, by the time something has become a policy, it has been talked to death, with all options explored and a universe of opinions added. Policies happen by consensus and often by unanimity. That’s a Higher Power as he may express himself in our group conscience.

Al-Anon was here long before I was, and the way it was when I found it was decided by its membership. I can participate in that now. But it really helps me to remember that “they” are “we”.

I’m a little discouraged. Generally, my spouse hosts a discussion group a few times a year that involve using the 12 traditions in our personal lives, and I’m now involved in hosting as well. Used to be, it was hard to get a seat in one of these, they’d fill up so fast, and people would have to wait for the next round.

We had one scheduled for January and had to cancel because nearly all the confirmed participants canceled the week prior. There’s one this weekend, and it too is being swept by last-minute cancellations. This happened for one of the sessions last year as well.

This is baffling. Is it God trying to tell us to stop hosting them? We usually schedule one when lots of people start asking us when the next one will be, expressing a lot of interest in participating.

We’ve decided that our boundary is going to be that when people start asking again, to tell them we’ll happily chair it, but they have to host it. I expect most if not all will decline, but that gives people a chance to find their level of commitment before we discover it in their last-minute cancellation.